Asylum Vaccines and Other Plague-ish Things
It has been over ten years since Sister Madly first encountered the Dodo, an entity against whom she was won many battles, but to whom she has lost the war.
Unless, of course, they meet again- which just might be happening.
You see, Sister Madly believes that the Dodo is currently taunting her in absentia. Within the last few weeks, there’s been a sudden onslaught of search engine terms which address the Dodo specifically. She believes the Old Bird is behind this, for not only are these searches bizarre, some cannot be recreated– further proof of the Dodo’s Evil Agenda.
Sister Madly ought to draw a new pic of
the Dodo- or enlist an unbiased artist who
will not scribble over the final work as
an act of retribution.
~ HOT DODO ~
Who, but who would think the Dodo is hot, if not the Dodo himself? He is anything but: he is sinister, creepy-looking, more than ready to diagnose you with the plague (jerk) and experienced with an insult.
But he is anything but hot.
(There is a possibility that it was an unrelated party responsible for the above search. It’s not recommended that you attempt this one yourself; let us just say, the person who found his way here was thoroughly disappointed.)
~ PLAGUE DOCTOR MOTTO ~
It now appears that the Dodo may have been behind the translation of Sister Madly’s family motto. She didn’t think so at the time, but the evidence is mounting. He was, after all, there that day.
Who else could manipulate ancient Latin to read ‘Strength, Honor and a Soft-Shelled Almond‘ ?
~ ASYLUM VACCINES ~
Sister Madly has no explanation for this one.
~ CRAZY BIRD AUTOPSY ~
Nor for this.
~ TIN FOIL PLAGUE BIRD ~
Especially not for this.
~ PLAGUE DOCTOR DEGREE ~
Sister Madly once made a similar claim, which backfired.
~ SKEKSIS ~
Perhaps the most compelling evidence of all. Though it was only mentioned once or twice in the comments, the Dodo went by the name Skeksis. While Sister Madly saw the resemblance even back then, calling him the ‘ugly bird-like thing from Dark Crystal‘ was just not practical.
So it is with this same vindictive spirit that Sister Madly has decided to relate one of her (admittedly indirect) victories over the Dodo: the Living Chess Match.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
It shocked the Professors the day Sister Madly volunteered for the Chess Match. Though it was out of character, Sister Madly found herself in a peculiar mood, one dripping with witticism and the confidence that the gods were smiling upon her. She knew the Dodo often played the match, and she wanted to use her newfound witticism against him. Indeed, it was a peculiar mood.
And it just so happened that the gods were smiling upon Sister Madly that day:
You wanna play chess, Sister Madly?
Great Old One just might get out of bed for that.
You see, this was no ordinary chess match. There was an additional rule to liven things up, of which the Professors were well-aware even as Sister Madly was not: whenever a piece landed on a square already occupied by the opposing team, the two may fight for possession if the original occupant issued a challenge.
When the rules were explained, Sister Madly found that she was no longer in the grip of this peculiar mood; rather, the notion of sitting on an anthill on the other side of the Faire became very appealing. The chances of battling it out with the Dodo, which appeared unlikely in the beginning, suddenly seemed inevitable- and this game was not going to be won by insults.
Sister Madly never got the chance to challenge Skeksis directly; they only ever came within a square and a few feisty insults of each other. As for her teammate… when the Bishop found himself on the verge of forfeiting, Sister Madly proposed the challenge of removing the Dodo’s mask.
… Sister Madly.
You see, the Dodo was never without his mask; he was notoriously stubborn about it. So it came as no surprise that he ultimately refused, thus forfeiting the square; what surprised Sister Madly was that this was accepted as a legitimate challenge in the first place. It surprised Skeksis, too: he threw a Dum Dum at her.
To this day, Sister Madly has never seen his face, if he has one…
*Due to an overall lack of excitement, Great Cthulhu lost interest in the match and went on to smile upon the road construction situation 15 miles west, which may account for Sister Madly’s victory.
It also accounts for the 90 minute delay driving home that night.