It’s a lawless time in the Madliverse.
While normally a docile Moppet in this independent reality of cynicism and Ferrero Rocher, Sister Madly officially violated the Geneva Convention when she punched the Fruit Fly who was side eyeing her cider.
And no, she will not be explaining.
This was but one amongst many a February tragedy, from misdirected mail to appliances breaking down, to the weather having the audacity to be sunny when she was promised rain. Sister Madly recognizes the importance of picking her battles- and like a proper lunatic, she was picking them all.
But then, like a yellow M&M in a bag full of raisins, an invitation to an exclusive Soiree found its way into her possession. The Host, gracious with his salutations, assured her that everyone would be most disappointed if she did not attend, and Sister Madly hates to disappoint.*
* She is, however, very good at it.
This very well may be her proudest moment. Here it was, the chance to rub shoulders with the local Elite (albeit figuratively, as it would be held online per pandemic guidelines) and engage in stimulating conversation with strangers regarding someone else’s actions like a boss. Any punk who struts into Sister Madly’s virtual courtroom like they own 51% of the company will tremble beneath her Resting Judgy Face- a technique she learned from her nephew, Collywobbles.
As the quietest place in her apartment in the morning is her bathtub- the local Radiator Banshee hosts a concert in the studio until about 10:04 AM- Sister Madly may need to kick off the party with her daily bathing ritual, but surely this will be overlooked. She would be responsible for her own libation, however; any gracious Host- in this case, the Circuit Court of [REDACTED] County- would greet her at the door with unlimited mimosas and Bloody Mary’s, but as there was a pandemic, Sister Madly would have to improvise.
So, what’s a good bubble bath scent for a Jury Party? Something that will complement the cider she will be drinking… or how about a bath bomb? Something red- there’s nothing like a good prank to get a party going, especially the ol’ Fake Murder in a Bathtub gag.
Needless to say, Sister Madly was rather looking forward to that day.
However, while perfecting her Resting Judgy Face the evening prior, Sister Madly received an email ceremoniously uninviting her to the Soiree. Apparently, they had a guest limit, and Sister Madly’s healthy skepticism of the bright side of things didn’t make the cut.
- 6-8 boneless chick thighs, cubed
- 3 garlic cloves, minced
- 1 TBSP lemon juice
- 2 tsp parsley
- 1 tsp oregano
- ½ tsp thyme
- ½ tsp rosemary
- ½ tsp pepper
- ½ tsp salt, to taste
- ¼ tsp smoked paprika
- olive oil, as needed
Mix spices, lemon juice, and garlic with olive oil
Marinate for 30min-24 hours
Skewer chicken on metal or pre-soaked bamboo skewers
Grill until chicken is thoroughly cooked
~ OR ~
Skip the skewers and cook chicken in a cast iron skillet *
* In which case it is no longer souvlaki, but no one will know if you keep it to yourself.